I'm home now and Mom is by herself....

I have taken a few days off from updating the blog. I kept meaning to and it just didn't happen. It has really amazed me how many people are reading the blog - it is almost scary to me. I use the blog to help me vent and work through what is happening with Mom. I also use it to get information to everyone about how she is doing - she has so many people who love her and care about her. Sometimes the lines between getting her friends and family her information and helping me work through what I'm going through become blurred. I apologize that that is the case but not sure much is going to change.

Thursday, Mom had a good day. So many visitors - probably too many. Leonara came by to give her a Christmas hug and some beautiful flowers. Nancy came by to bring her some lunch - thank you Nancy - it was a treat for me as well to not have to go get her anything. Donna, Mom's cousin's Edith's daughter, and her family came by for a quick visit. They live in Alaska and it was sweet of them to think of Mom on their vacation. They brought by Alaska fudge and salmon that they had caught themselves! What a treat! Mom rested for a few hours. While she was resting, I went to the storage shed - I won't even go into detail about how many boxes are left but when I counted them I realized it was more than I thought, even though we have gone through at least half of the boxes that were in the shed to begin with. She has so many treasures, patterns, pieces of fabric, started projects - it is incredible! I came home and have started boxes of my own things to give away, just to make sure that I don't become too much like her!
In the afternoon, we went and picked up Berlin and went up to Brent & Jill's to make some Christmas fudge. The recipe is one that Mom has been making for years. It was Grandma J's recipe and she used to make it in the New York Stake to raise funds to build more ward buildings in her stake. Berlin and Grandma and I had so much fun making the fudge and homemade peanut butter cups. I hope that Berlin will have that memory stored away for later - so she can remember how much her Grandma loves her and how important chocolate was to her too!

Mom and I finished up the Everett Journal when we got home. This was Mom's last edition - she has done 34 in all. In the beginning, Mom would do two a year. After a few years of that, she went to one edition every year. For those of you who don't know, Mom would ask all of her cousins and siblings to write letters and entries, spotlighting her dad and his siblings. Every year there was a different spotlight. Her cousins also used this as the chance to get their Christmas letter to everyone else. Mom also compiled all of the births, graduations, wedding and deaths for the year. I know that I didn't do the perfect job that Mom would have done - but it is completed and I know that Mom is grateful for that. I mailed all 27 copies on Friday, an hour before leaving for the airport. Mom wanted desperately to write a personal note in each one or put a Christmas card in each one but it wasn't to be this year. For those of you Everetts that email, when you get your journal, I'm sure Mom would appreciate an email (ruthann@jespersen.org). She feels such a duty to reciprocate the love that she has gotten. For every phone call and bouquet of flowers that she gets, she feels like she needs to thank each person individually with a handwritten note. I wish I could help her realize that this isn't necessary.

Thursday night, I went with Brent, Jill & Berlin over to Roy and Anne's house. I hadn't had the opportunity to see it before. Roy and Anne have been so gracious to Mom since she has moved to Salt Lake. It was fun to get to see their beautiful house and get to see Roy and Anne.
Friday was crazy. I felt like there was so much to do before I left town. Christmas presents to wrap for Mom. Fudge to package up for a few of her dear friends (Celia, there is some for you set aside). Everett Journal had to be picked up from the printer and assembled, mailing labels typed and printed, and envelopes sealed and ready to go to the post office. Stacy and the kids came by for a quick visit. Laura came by to help Mom deliver some of her fudge. It was kind of crazy!

Yesterday, Nancy called to see if Mom wanted any Stouffer's. I'm so grateful for Nancy. She has really helped Mom and she really wants to help Mom how Mom wants to be helped - not her own agenda. This is something that is hard for me to do sometimes. I want to help her (of course) but I want to help her how I think she wants to be helped, not always how she may want to be helped. I'm not sure if this makes sense but trust me there is a difference.
Also, yesterday, Laura went over to vacuum and bring her a few groceries and some quarters for laundry. This was so nice of her.

I think that one of the things that we can really do to help her feel comfortable is by making sure that she has everything she might need at her fingertips, so she doesn't feel like just because she isn't driving, she doesn't have what she needs. I believe that she will continue to not drive. We talked about it and it worries me to think of her driving. She can do it, just her reaction time and her senses aren't what they used to be.

Friday night, she also had her first visit from the hospice nurse. I was already gone but from Mom's report, this seemed to be not a big deal.


For those of you that check in every day to the blog, take some days off. I'm going to!